What do you feel is more intimate: giving a blowjob or having sex? : AskWomen

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I save bj's for the very very special guys, the ones I'm very seriously involved with within a monogamous loving relationship. Women might use these toys on themselves as their partner watches or gently caresses them. Either way, it is important to verbally let your partner know what turns you on the most. You can guide him by placing your fingers over his fingers or hand, and pressing the spots you like in the motion and frequency that makes you go wild.

Men who like to have sex with women, and women who like to have sex with men are or. In your first sentence, you mention that you are trying to stop masturbating. Despite the changes that aging invariably brings, couples open to erotic alternatives will discover that they can still together.

Sexual intercourse

The recent abstinence threads got me thinking about this again. There are women who consider oral sex as something special. While dating they will only go down on a guy they really dig. Or even after marriage it is something that is at an extra level of intimacy. On the other side you have women who are very, very picky about who they sleep with but will give blowjobs almost casually. Last time I conducted this poll with my lady friends it seemed to break down evenly. I assumed that with the continuing sexual revolution more women would be in the picky about blowjobs category. However, hearing all these stories about younger and younger girls giving oral sex to schoolmates, I am beginning to think I am wrong. Which do you consider more intimate. And how big a part did your upbringing play. I can only speak for my twisted upbringing and a certain group of friends I happen to hang out with. Head is received joyfully and also indiscriminately. Straight-up-sex is kept firmly out-of-reach unless the individual is Really Serious, About to Marry, Engaged or Wed-Till-Death-Do-They-Part. In a way the results of this pattern of behavior end up as somewhat amusing-most have entertained over two hand's worth of men in bed while keeping actual numbers to a bare minimum-zero. I'm 37, so I can hardly speak about the views of the younger crowd, and giving blow jobs are certainly not a topic my friends and I discuss on a general level, however, I can speak for myself. There was a point in my life when I treated it all rather casually however, not as casually as I've heard some. This isn't to say I slept around and I certainly wasn't into one night stands, but did practice serial monogomy and could still list all my sexual partners. There are many out there who couldn't do that. My practices changed when I experienced health related difficulties as a result. It was an eye opening experience and scared me half to death. It certainly acted as a wake up call. That what is more intimate oral or intercourse about five years ago, and since then I've practiced celibacy--not by choice exactally, but simply by becoming much more picky about those with whom I'm sexually intimate. I've finally found someone who I would consider becoming sexually intimate, however, our relationship hasn't progressed to that point. That being said, I think giving a blow job can be an extremely powerful position for the person giving it. Think about it--the giver has the power to make the other person climax or notat the pace and leisure or what is more intimate oral or intercourse of the giver. I've been known to have a man grasping on the edge of his sanity, hanging on every single motion I make, literally begging. However, it's no longer casual. I think of blowjobs and vaginal sex as equal, but neither is necessarily intimate. Sometimes it's just screwing around, ya know. It's rare for me to give a blowjob to a one-night-stand, bu that's just because there's usually less chance it'll be reciprocated. In general, I'm as likely to give a blowjob as I am to have sex my preference is to do one and then the other, but sometimes physical limitations interfere. I think that most women who treat blowjobs as something special just don't enjoy giving them. So they save them for guys they really, really like, as a gift of sorts. And it makes sense that if a woman didn't like giving blowjobs before she got married, she still won't like giving them after she's married, and it becomes one of those I have the guy, so thank og I don't have to do that anymore things. Regarding the power thing, I don't get off on that at least, I don't think I do. A guy friend asked me about that a few years ago, when we got to talking frankly about sex and I told him that I genuinely enjoy giving blowjobs. It's more about appreciation of the male anatomy, and enjoying giving my partner pleasure. I often wish there were a way I could see the guy's face while it's happening. As for the upbringing part, I don't see any connection. It's not like mom ever took me aside and talked about this stuff. I think it helps that I had a significantly older sex partner when I was in my early 20s; I learned a lot from him, and to this day any man I sleep with owes him a small debt of gratitude. Involves more trust to me than just screwing Opposite here. Vag involves sharing of myself, oral can be just performance and non-intimate. Not able to do the casual sex thing. I found this out the hard way - where my body goes, my heart follows. Therefore, sex is very intimate for me, whether it is oral or vaginal. By the time I trust you enough to let you touch my body, where you touch me or with what becomes simply a variation on the theme. I know you said women only but I feel left out and would like to offer a sensible man's opinion. You can start ignoring me now. I find giving a woman head so much more intimate than vaginal sex. But from what my girl friends not girlfriends have told me, vaginal sex is more. You can now resume your girly chat. I think the intimacy lies in the emotions behind the act, not the act itself. While I am one of those seemingly rare, but not as rare as men think women who enjoys going down, I've developed a rule over the years. It is the Rule of Reciprocation. You don't pay me back, I'm not going to do it again. I never give head outside of serious relationships, I give them to my fiance, but before him even my serious relationship partners didn't get them often. I have, however, had many affairs and partners who I felt ok about having sex with but would never even think to give head. For me, it's very intimate and I have to really trust someone before I'll put myself in that situation. Thanks to all the ladies for chiming in, and thanks in advance to anyone else who weighs in. Even with the anonymity of the Internet, I know it's tough to put yourself out there. I guess I muddied the water with upbringing, but my theory is that girls who are taught their vagina sounds so damn clinical is the holiest of holies and should be defended like sexual Missile Command, are the ones most likely to be casual about oral sex. I just find it facinating how women rank sexual intimacies. If I like and trust you, we can have sex. If I really like and trust you, I'll go down on you. If I super like and trust you, I might consider anal. If I love you and trust you, I'll let you tie me up. I just find it facinating how women rank sexual intimacies. I mean, he's inside a what is more intimate oral or intercourse of your body that is more intimate than your mouth, he's inside your most intimate place. Also, in many or most positions, you're looking into each other's eyes, and kissing, and smiling, and laughing, maybe even talking. And, both of you are gaining physical pleasure from it. I like giving blow jobs, but I don't really get any physical pleasure from them. With vaginal sex, both partners are experiencing the same physical pleasure. I miss the guy I am dating :D I'm 29, have had about 8 sexual partners two of them accounting for six yearsand in every single case, oral sex came well before vaginal sex. Personally, I've always thought of oral sex as a fairly casual thing. I can see how others see the other way, but I've yet to meet a woman or man who saves it until after regularly sleeping with someone. The whole handcuffs and ropes thing has somehow gotten pretty standard. I've only done anal with one girl, on her insistance. Female, quickly nearing 46 years old here. I save bj's for the very very special guys, the ones I'm very seriously involved with within a monogamous loving relationship. It's more of an internal ding musical note floating at which you feel comfortable enough with, and close enough to this one person to be that intimate. But then as I said, I don't tend to view regular sex casually either. Upbringing and generation do have a bearing on a person's view regarding sex. Though I what is more intimate oral or intercourse think that women withhold sex so much because of viewing their vaginas as holiest of holy as they withhold it because they don't want the hit and run of a player. So those that are looking for something more serious tend to hold out hoping for a connection of the heart as well as of the physical. Yikes, I totally didn't mean to imply that. As an aside, I find the idea of anyone doing anything just to get the ring abhorrent. As I said, like a gift of sorts e. It just definitely would never be casual with her. When I wrote the I have the guy, so thank og I don't have to do that anymore thing, I didn't have in mind that it was deliberate. More like how sometimes men stop giving women flowers after they're married, etc. For those people, the blowjobs and flowers are just part of courtship, not any Machiavellian plan whose sole point is to get hitched. I'm not saying it's right, just another way of thinking about stuff like that. Anway, I certainly did not mean to imply that every woman who considers blowjobs to be special doesn't like giving them, nor that many if any women would use them as a way to get a ring. Not any harder than it is for me to explain what I'm trying to say. The woman who was my best friend for 16 years couldn't ever have casual sex, either. It was a topic of conversation for us many times, me trying to understand how she couldn't and her what is more intimate oral or intercourse to understand how I could. I know you'd stopped replying to me at this point, but I'd just like to throw this in: these days I'm less likely to have a one-nighter because I don't want the he's bad at this of a player.

I mean, he's inside a part of your body that is more intimate than your mouth, he's inside your most intimate place. The risk is also higher if you have cuts, sores or ulcers in your mouth. Dear Reader, This is one of those questions that can't be answered with a simple yes or no. Thankfully he feels the same, and most of the time I find myself being pulled up to the surface for a long, hungry kiss and then sex begins. Every type from fighters to helicopters from air forces around the globe Props and jets from the good old days Views from inside the cockpit Passenger cabin shots showing seat arrangements as well as cargo aircraft interior Pictures of great freighter aircraft Aircraft flying government officials Our large helicopter section. Doctors call the condition as dyspareunia. A guy friend asked me about that a few years ago, when we got to talking frankly about sex and I told him that I genuinely enjoy giving blowjobs. You can try using your own fingers during sex, too! Slangs for oral sex is common in Western cultures, for example: going down on, giving a , giving head, or eating out.